Sunday, April 3, 2016

A POST ON PEOPLE WHO TRY TO STEAL YOUR JOY

Today I'm chatting about people stealing your joy, and how to react to it.

I know, diving RIGHT in with a super uplifting topic for a Sunday, right?

It sounds silly to say out loud..."she stole my joy". It sounds emo and whiny but when it happens, it sucks. It can take the wind out of your sails- and if you don't find a way to deal with it, you can waste a lot of time fixating on it.

If you're reading this blog post and are feeling like I'm a complete whack-job, let me give and example, mmmkay?

So you are working on planning BIG event, and you're feeling all:

So you tell someone important to you, expecting they're going to be like:

via GIPHY

....but instead they're like:

via GIPHY

They tell you they aren't going, and they won't even make an effort to be there..which leaves you all like:

via GIPHY

You feel me now?
Joy. Stolen. 

 It can be so hard when you are genuinely happy about something and someone walks right on up to you and smacks it out of your hands.

The thing about stealing joy is that in order for it to happen, you have to allow it to happen.

If you are thrilled about your pursuit to go to law school, and you let someone steal your joy by telling you that they think lawyers are arrogant con artists- that's your choice. You can cry in the corner- or you can give them the middle finger as they walk away (clearly the latter sounds more fun).

I'm not at expert at blocking joy-stealers out, but here is what I CAN suggest doing:

1. Manage expectations when you tell news to someone who has let you down in the past. It's not rocket science, but if they've rained on your parade in the past, it's likely they'll do it again. This is a fine line between assuming the worst in people and just being realistic- so walk it carefully, my friends. There's someone in my life who consistently ignores my good news if it doesn't involve them- so I try to avoid telling them until I've shared it with other, more supportive people.

2. Lean on those who you know will be supportive and uplifting. Also, not rocket science.We all have that one friend or family member that is just a basket of love and joy. You can tell them you got a new haircut and they tell you that you look fabulous. You can tell them you got a promotion and they'll have a card to you in the mail overnight. THOSE are the people you should tell your news to first. (Shoutout to my girl Adrienne- she's one of those people in my life that without fail brings a positive attitude wherever she goes!)

3. Keep news to yourself for longer. Sometimes when you get good news you just want to shout it from the rooftops instantly. I cannot even count how many times I wish I'd just kept my mouth shut a little longer and get the happy news to myself to just purely enjoy before I let it out. I've found that the (few) times I've managed to hold of on telling people exciting things, and allowed myself more time to relish in it- when I finally do share it, their responses don't affect me as much. The joy has gotten deep enough into my skin they can't take it! (Cheesy, but so true!)

Now, there's one more tip I have to give out, and this is something that I need to work on:

When you have great news- don't downplay it just to appease other people.
A few months ago I was with a group of friends and shared some news that on the inside I was SO giddy about. I played it off like it was no big deal and that I was soooo chill about it, which was purely a defense mechanism. I figured if I didn't act like I was overjoyed then I wouldn't be disappointed if THEY didn't act overjoyed. You know what happened? They called me out on it and couldn't believe why I wasn't more excited- and I felt like a complete idiot admitting I had downplayed it because I thought they wouldn't react how I had hoped.

Moral of the story:
Share your joy- but don't allow others to steal it.
You can't control their reactions, but you can control how you let their reactions affect you!
don't let anyone steal your joy


How do you handle it when people try to steal your joy?
I'm trying to work on something more mature than the middle-finger-when-they-walk-away trick :)

xo, LP






*update: please note, i've totally been guilty of stealing joy before. you probably are too. good people can sometimes be so caught up in their own worlds that they accidentally hurt someone. there's a fine line between being a devil's advocate about stuff and being a party pooper- i'll promise to be more sensitive to it if you all will, mmkay?"


(let's be instagram friends and share joy together, shall we? find me HERE!)

Thursday, March 24, 2016

THE 6 (best) BAGS EVERY WOMAN SHOULD OWN

Let me start out with this:
I understand not all women care about purses/bags. 
Some just have a tote they bought on sale at Gap for $6 and use it everywhere (cough cough me in college).
Some just keep a wallet in their back pocket and call it a day.
I, however, have become a purse hoarder in my wise-old age of 28, and these are the 6 bags I always use for every event I go to.
Is this a shallow / materialistic post?
YES! Congrats! You've figured it out! But believe it or not, I get asked where I buy my purses when I'm out- so this post is for those laaaaadies.
If you're not interested, please move along. I don't care for the "why are you posting about bags there are more important issues in the world" comments today.
I'm aware there are more important issues in the world, however, some people like to take their minds off of those issues for a few minutes a day and read post about bags. So. Back. Off.
Rant over.

For those of you that are interested, these are the 6 bags that I own (or versions of, if the ones I own are sold out) that I use for every even possible. Work, Working out, Weddings; you name it, these cover it.
Read below for the details!
The 6 best bags every woman should own!
The Crossbody Bags.

I own 3 cross body bags- each a different color and size, in a specific order. Am I neurotic? Yes! But here's why:

1. The small, neutral greyish-blushish crossbody: I own a slightly older model of this Kate Spade Cedar Hill Cross Body. I use this bag exclusively for weddings/fancy events where I want my dress to be the attention-grabber- and the purse solely to function as a place to store my phone, my money, my lipstick, and a ton of bandages for when my high heels rip apart my feet after dancing for 5 hours straight. This bag runs about $148 at full price, but you can totally find cheaper versions like THIS one.

2. The small-but-slightly-larger black crossbody: This is usually my night-on-the-town purse. Black because it goes with everything and if I spill on it ya can't see it. #truth. It's a little larger that the neutral one above so I can store a few more items in it. Yes, I've gone rogue and used this one at a wedding before. Because I'm a rebel like that. (please tell me sarcasm is coming across on this one). I own a now discontinued Tory Burch number, but the one I show above is neat too. If $300+ isn't in your budget, try THIS one.

3. The halfway handbag- halfway crossbody cognac crossbody: How's that for a clear description? I use this guy when I want to have a relatively low profile bag, but still want to pack my instax camera & a ginger ale. Yes, literally. Because fun fact: I usually have a ginger ale with me wherever I go...but that's a story for another day. This Michael Kors one is exactly the one I own and have used for get-togethers or blog events. It'll run you about $228, but HERE is a cheaper one.

The Tote Bags.

I could write an ode to totes. Because they have all the space in the world and I love them:

4. The canvas zip-top tote: I have a couple of these- one is my gym bag and the other is my work computer bag & and most importantly- my travel bag. The zip top is AMAZING because you can close it and tuck it under a seat on an airplane and your cell phone and tampons won't fly under your seat and cause you to ask your neighbor to help you pick them up #beenthere. These bags will run you about $30-$40 at LLBean/Lands' End, so I'm not even going to offer a cheaper version, cuz that's hella cheap.

5. The nylon packable tote: I love this bag because if you spill on it- or you get caught in a rainstorm- it doesn't get ruined. That's because it's super durable nylon! Plus, when empty it packs up into a tiny rectangle- which is great when you're travelling and want more than one purse option when you get to your destination- this takes up almost no space in a suitcase. I swear by THIS Longchamp (shown above) which will run you $145, however you can find cheaper nylon bags like THIS one.

6. The oversized leather tote: I alternate between this bag and #5 as my everyday-bring-to-work bags. I own the exact color shown above from Madewell ($170) and now that it's broken in the leather is like buttttahhhh. It holds a ton of stuff and goes with any casual outfit. Plus it's purty on the instagramz. Pretty much everyone and their mother has knocked this bag off, so you can find a cheaper one HERE.

What bag do you swear by?
Are you a hoarder like I am??

xo, lp





proof of the bagz and that i'm not just lying to you:
*also- more proof of bag love on my instagram HERE


*also also- no one sponsored this post. i just really like to go on long diatribes about bags. because i'm crazy like that. also, because i'll get fired if i don't mention it- i work for lands' end, but i get NO benefit from posting about that tote at work-swear on my love for bags that i don't. *

Thursday, March 10, 2016

A REMINDER TO STAY POSITIVE (THANKS VIOLA)

(if you're not in the mood for a lengthy post, just skip it and read the reason I'm writing this post; this article)


I love going into antique stores & flea markets. Especially ones in small towns.
Michael is used to this fact- and whenever we go on roadtrips and I see the rusty old "Vintage Shop" sign- I beg and plead until we pull over to search for hidden treasures for half an hour.
(Baby Laura circa 2006 posing with a flea market sign. Why did I think this was cool? Oy.)

A couple years ago we were driving through Stockton, Minnesota- and I saw an "Old Tyme Shoppe" sign. I didn't even have to open my mouth, Michael just rolled his eyes (with a smile on his face) and parked out front. An old woman welcomed me when I entered- and her eyes lit up when she saw Michael walk in behind me- in all his 6'1" glory. 
"Would you mind coming back here and helping me?", she asked, turning towards the back.
Michael and I followed her as she opened the door which led into her attached home. She explained something was wrong with the AC vent, and she couldn't reach it- so she asked Michael to help make it right. While he tinkered, she showed me antique baubles and we chatted.

At the time I was totally baffled (as I always am in such small towns) of the complete and total trust and faith she had in humanity. She took one look at us and trusted us to come right on into her home without a second thought that we might rob her blind. 

We bought a couple items and headed out- with her thanking Michael for his help and waving as we went. We've passed that store a few times since that trip, and each time we would recall how hilarious we thought it was that she had no shame in asking us for help, and let us into her home so freely.

I hadn't thought of her in a while, until Michael sent me this article today, which was republished out of remembrance (as she passed away a few days ago). As I read it I couldn't help but tear up. I didn't even know this woman well, but hearing about all she had been through in her life was overwhelming.


When I finished reading it I wanted to run over to Michael's work and hug him. And then drive to Minnesota and hug my parents. And then drive back here and hug Michael again. 


So stop reading this ridiculous post, and go read this wonderful article about her life. I dare you not to be inspired to be a more appreciative, positive person. It's such a necessary reminder that you have no idea what other people have gone through, and to treat everyone you meet with kindness- like she did with Michael and me that day.


When you finish reading it- send it to someone else!


xo, lp




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